Love at First Sight & Attitudes to Love

With the help of dating apps and social media, love at first sight is no longer limited to chance encounters at the bar or bumping into “the one” on the street. Today, we can fall in love at first swipe, or feel an instant connection through a profile picture. And with 94% of Americans surveyed saying they have been in love, it’s fair to say that we are a nation of romantics. But how many of us really believe in the magic of falling in love after a single glance?

We interviewed over 2,000 Americans to determine how many of us have experienced or believe in love at first sight, or whether we think a slow-burn romance is worth the wait. We also set out to find out the average relationship timeline — from the moment you realized you were in love to your partner popping the question. 

Love at First Swipe

Whether you are a firm believer in sparks flying instantly or enjoy watching love bloom slowly, the idea of love at first sight has been at the forefront of fairytales and stories for centuries. And while only 19% claim to have experienced love at first sight, over one in five Americans (21%) believe in it. Even 14% of those who have never been in a relationship believe in the power of love at a glance, proving the magnetic pull of instant attraction. 

Beyond the fairytale, however, lies the modern love story of dating apps and social media. Almost a third (31%) of people who met their current partner through a dating app say they believe in love at first sight, showing that an instant connection can spark even when you aren’t face-to-face. Additionally, 13% of the population claim to have fallen in love or developed romantic feelings for someone they have never met in person, illustrating the powerful role digital connections play in shaping modern romance. Interestingly, while the magic of an instant connection captivates many, timing plays a significant factor in love, with 33% considering it one of the most important elements in building a relationship.

Rom-coms and love stories may have universal appeal, but some groups feel the charm more than others. Interestingly, over one-fifth (22%) of men believe in the notion of love at first sight compared to 20% of women. Guys are also quicker to fall, with 17% saying it took a week or less of dating to know they were in love compared to 14% of women. It’s clear that, despite the stereotypes, America’s men might just be hopeless romantics after all. 

However, over a quarter (27%) of Americans feel that compatibility is more important than chemistry, preferring to test the waters with their relationship rather than trusting their instant connection.

Slow and Steady Wins the Heart

While an instant spark with someone can be electric, the slow burn of a friends-to-lovers relationship can be just as rewarding, accounting for 29% of relationships. There’s no better place to celebrate this heartwarming romantic trope than Tennessee, where the charm of Southern hospitality shines through. Nearly half of Tennesseans (48%) say they were friends with their partner or spouse before romance blossomed.

Americans search “should I text my ex” on Google an average of 2,400 times a month, but can a second chance with an ex really lead to love? About one in 10 (10%) have managed to rekindle an old flame, proving that sometimes giving an ex another shot can lead to lasting love. Younger adults, particularly those aged 18 to 24, seem especially open to forgiveness, with 17% finding success after reuniting with a former partner. And for singletons reminiscing about an ex, Arkansas might just be the place to be, with 25% believing in second-chance romance.

However, 15% of Americans prefer to prioritize that immediate intense connection when they choose a partner. Men are slightly more inclined toward this than women, with 16% of men seeking this powerful connection over a slow burn compared to 14% of women. When you compare the states, Nebraska leads the charge, with almost half of the residents (47%) chasing that instant spark.

Milestones in Modern Relationships 

There is no correct route to love, but there are key moments and milestones that often define and deepen a relationship. With 2,400 searches a month for ‘“when should I say I love you?” it’s clear that many people feel uncertain about the right time to take that next step. On average, it takes 3.8 months in a relationship to know that those butterflies we feel are love, but we will then wait over two weeks before admitting it (0.6 months after). 

While 9% don’t believe in the one,” almost one in five (18%) knew they were in love after the first date. For most, though, the realization unfolds more gradually, as 29% discover they’ve found their true love after the fifth date, allowing their feelings to build naturally over time. Moving toward exclusivity happens, on average, around the 3.9-month mark, and the first “I love you” tends to follow at around 4.4 months. 

Timing and communication play pivotal roles throughout relationship milestones, but it seems that many prefer an unspoken understanding over a formal discussion. While it’s often said that communication is key, only 19% of people actually had “the talk” to define their relationship with their partner. Interestingly, men are more likely to take the emotional leap, with 29% admitting they said “I love you” first, compared to just 16% of women.

Eventually, you need to leave the cozy love bubble you have created with your new partner and introduce them to other important people in your life. We seem rather protective of our friendship circles, and with good reason too! Friends can be the ultimate red flag raisers, ready to call out any questionable vibes from a new lover that you may have missed in the honeymoon stage. On average, we are putting our partner under the friends test after 3.7 months of dating. It’s only after receiving the stamp of approval from our trusted circle that we move on to the next big step: meeting the parents. Typically, this milestone comes about 1.7 months after the friends have given their blessing.

After all the dates, the talks, and introductions, it’s only a matter of time before someone gets down on one knee and pops the question; an average of 15 months (one year and three months), to be exact. Mississippi leads the way as the fastest state to say “yes,” with couples averaging just 6.4 months before taking the plunge. Meanwhile, in Minnesota, couples seem to cherish the journey, taking their time to truly savor the dating phase. On average, they wait a leisurely 19.1 months — just over a year and a half — before saying “yes” to forever.

The Evolution of Love at First Sight

The idea of love at first sight has captivated hearts for centuries, with scenes of fateful glances and instant, magnetic connections. But is it merely the stuff of romantic novels, or is there science behind such an intense bond? According to award-winning sex and relationship coach, Gemma Nice, love at first sight is not only possible but can be a profound experience that transcends logic and taps into something deeply spiritual and physical.

This powerful attraction, she says, is often characterized by an undeniable combination of sexual chemistry, emotional intelligence, and physical connection that emerges from the moment you meet. Nice says, “When the couple look at each other, they just know and have an energetic surge towards each other, feeling completely besotted and wanting to stay in that moment, never wanting it to end.”

The experience of love at first sight is not merely physical; it involves a complex dance of emotions and biological reactions. She describes the sensation as a flood of excitement and elation, accompanied by physical signs such as increased heart rate, rapid breathing, sweaty palms, and butterflies in the stomach. “This is caused by an increase in serotonin and oxytocin—your calming and love hormones,” she notes, which fuels an overwhelming desire to be closer to the source of those heart-fluttering feelings. 

With US searches for ‘tinder’ decreasing by 19% in the last year, Nice suggests that modern dating has shifted how people experience love at first sight. She explains, “People are now meeting a lot more in person at events and at bars and pubs rather than hiding behind the dating app. This is where love at first sight can be better in today’s society as you can get to know the person right there and then, instead of sending messages and dating online.” 

According to Nice, love at first sight is so much more than a fleeting feeling. That instant spark can be the doorway to something far deeper, and as Nice says, “If you feel this immense feeling, there is something there other than physical attraction,” so it’s always worth exploring what that feeling could bloom into.

The Love Language of Giving 

Some romantics can’t help but wear their hearts on their sleeve and shout their love from the rooftops, while others are just as passionate, yet more subtle in their displays of affection. Way back, in ancient Rome, a man didn’t need to fight to the death for their lover’s hand, just a simple iron band was enough to say “I love you.” While iron is great to commemorate a six-year anniversary, how can you choose a piece of jewelry that truly captures the depth of your love and speaks straight to your partner’s heart today?

Emily Shultz, Director of Fashion Merchandising at Shane Co. says, “Jewelry has a special way of capturing a couple’s unique love story, weaving cherished memories and significant milestones into every sparkling detail. Whether it’s a pair of earrings to mark an anniversary or a simple pendant to say ‘I love you’, the most meaningful gifts are those that are personal and unique to you and your partner. Customizations like engravings or birthstone accents can transform an already beautiful gift into a direct message of love to your partner that they can wear and treasure.

“Unlike flowers that fade or chocolates that disappear (quickly!), jewelry has the unique advantage of standing the test of time. It’s not just a fleeting gesture; it’s a lasting statement. With proper care, a carefully selected necklace or ring can retain its shine for decades, becoming a cherished keepsake that your partner can carry with them through life’s milestones, and even pass down to future generations. 

“At its core, jewelry is so much more than an accessory. It’s a tangible expression of love, a lasting memory captured in a piece that becomes part of the wearer’s story. As a gift, it has the power to turn an ordinary day into an unforgettable “I love you”.”

Methodology

We surveyed over 2,000 Americans on their beliefs surrounding ‘love at first sight’, as well as exploring their dating milestone timelines. The survey was conducted in January 2025.

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