{"id":3539,"date":"2019-07-19T14:48:39","date_gmt":"2019-07-19T20:48:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shaneco.com\/theloupe\/?p=3539"},"modified":"2019-11-13T15:25:24","modified_gmt":"2019-11-13T22:25:24","slug":"how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shaneco.com\/theloupe\/jewelry-education\/how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged\/","title":{"rendered":"How Do You Know When You’re Ready to Get Engaged?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"Couple<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

You and your partner are very much in love and you\u2019ve been thinking \u2014 maybe even dropping hints<\/a> \u2014 about taking the next step. But how can you feel confident you\u2019re making the right decision, and what indicators should you look for to ensure you\u2019re really ready to get engaged<\/a>? We\u2019ve read up on interviews with psychologists and relationship experts as well as in-depth studies to figure out how to know you\u2019re ready to pop the question<\/a> (or say yes).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. You\u2019ve talked about your finances<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

It may not be romantic, but knowing where you and your partner stand when it comes to making financial decisions can make a big difference in the health of your future marriage. A poll<\/a> conducted in 2018 marked money worries near the top of the list for reasons why couples split up, citing arguments over finances as the final breaking point. While money-related stress is hard to avoid completely, making sure you\u2019re on the same page as your partner can make a lot of difference in avoiding financial arguments<\/a>. What do they consider a \u201cbig\u201d purchase? Are they saving up for a car, home or business? How will you divide financial obligations, and do you plan to have your bank accounts separate, joint or both?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Before deciding if you\u2019re ready to get engaged, you should be comfortable with your partner\u2019s answers to these questions and more. Remember to be honest with one another about not only your current financial state, but also your goals for the future and what you value \u2014 for example, if you love fashion, while you may think buying a $200 coat is a worthwhile purchase, your partner may not understand why it\u2019s worth that much. Be patient, and avoid getting upset about the bigger things by making money a regular part of your conversation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. You know how to fight fair<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\"Couple<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

Every couple fights \u2014 but do you and your partner know how\nto fight constructively? The Early\nYears of Marriage Study<\/a> looked at 373 couples over a 16-year period,\nstarting at the very first years of their marriages to discover why some\ncouples stuck together while others broke apart. As it turns out, couples in\nwhich both parties used constructive methods of fighting (staying calm,\nfocusing on communication, avoiding withdrawing or giving \u201cthe silent\ntreatment\u201d as a way of dealing with conflict) had lower divorce rates than\ncouples who didn\u2019t. It really comes down to this: There\u2019s no such thing as\n\u201cwinning\u201d an argument with your spouse. Having respect for your partner and\nremembering that even when you fight, you\u2019re still on the same team, is\nincredibly important when deciding to take the next step in your relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. You have realistic expectations about your relationship skills<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Understanding your partner\u2019s and your strengths and weaknesses is a huge part of feeling confident that you will be able to build a life together. One study<\/a> in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that marital satisfaction is highest in couples whose expectations matched their relationship skills \u2014 even if their skills rated higher than their expectations. Having expectations that are too high can lead to disappointment, while having low expectations can mean you never actually get to practice and appreciate the relationship skills you are best at. The idea that you know what to expect when it comes to marriage goes along with knowing your partner<\/a>. Make sure you\u2019re well aware of what areas of domestic life you both excel at, and how this will work realistically within your marriage before you decide if you are ready to get engaged.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. You say thank you<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

There will be moments in your marriage, and even in your\nengagement, where you may not feel like your relationship is at its best.\nHaving a partner that you know<\/em>\nrespects and appreciates you is very important when it comes to maintaining a happy\nlife together. Research\ndone by the University of Georgia<\/a> shows that expressions of gratitude are\none of the most consistent predictors of marital quality. While all\nrelationships will face difficulty, \u201cgratitude can help promote positive\nmarital outcomes,\u201d says the study\u2019s lead author, Allen Barton. Be aware of how\noften you and your partner say thank you, and ensure that gratitude is flowing\nfreely when figuring out if it\u2019s time to buy that ring.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

5. They\u2019re your best friend<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\"Karrie<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

When you receive news, good or bad, is your partner the\nfirst person you wish to share it with? Marriage experts continually stress the\nimportance of enjoying the time you spend with your spouse and considering them\nnot just a romantic partner, but also a friend. \u201cThe foundation of a good\nmarriage is a good friendship and sharing things with each other is a big part\nof that,\u201d licensed marriage and family therapist Nicole Richardson<\/a> states in an\narticle for Elite Daily<\/a>. So before you consider tying the knot,\nthink about your relationship with your significant other. If you \u201clook forward\nto waking up with your partner and seeing them at the end of day,\u201d relationship\ntherapist Dr. Gary Brown<\/a> says,\nthen you\u2019re probably on the fast track to getting engaged.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

6. You want it for all the right reasons<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

There are plenty of reasons to get engaged that don\u2019t\ninvolve the love you share with your partner. Feeling pressure from friends and\nfamily, being together in order to give off a good \u201cimage,\u201d seeing those around\nyou frequently getting married, or trying to deal with problems within yourself\nby tying the knot can all be enticing reasons to consider marriage \u2014 but none\nof them is the right one. Having a genuine admiration and respect for your\nspouse and wanting to make your relationship more permanent should be the\nunderlying reasons for considering marriage, even if you\u2019re feeling left out by\nthe plethora of engagement announcements sounding off in your periphery. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

7. You speak the same \u201clanguage\u201d<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\"Couple<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

One of the most popular books about relationships, discussed\nby psychologists<\/a>\nand skeptics alike, is Dr. Gary Chapman\u2019s \u201cThe Five Love Languages.\u201d In it, he\nlays out a model for how we give and receive love, saying that we all have a primary\nlove language<\/a> that reflects within our relationships. These languages\ninclude gift giving, quality time, physical touch, words of affirmation, and\nacts of service. While it\u2019s not necessary to have the same \u201clanguage\u201d as your\npartner, you should already be paying attention to what language they use to\ngive love, as this is generally how they like to receive it, too. You and your\nspouse should be aware of what matters most to one another \u2014 maybe you need to\nhear the words \u201cI love you\u201d often, while they need a lot of intimacy and touch\nto feel wanted in the relationship. Knowing how you both give and receive love\nwill keep you from feeling underappreciated as you move forward in your journey\nto engagement.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

8. They make you a better person<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Getting engaged means you\u2019re pledging to spend forever with\nyour one and only. So one of the most important questions you can ask yourself\nbefore putting on that ring is \u201cDoes my partner bring out the best in me?\u201d Life\ncoach Kali Rogers<\/a> stated in an\ninterview<\/a> with Bustle that \u201cit\u2019s really not about them. It\u2019s all about what\nkind of person you are, become, and feel like when you\u2019re in their presence.\nLove should bring forth confidence and security.\u201d If you feel like you are\ntruly embracing the \u201creal you\u201d when you\u2019re with your partner, then it may be\ntime to get engaged.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"You and your partner are very much in love and you\u2019ve been thinking \u2014 maybe even dropping hints…\n","protected":false},"author":76,"featured_media":3830,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"rop_custom_images_group":[],"rop_custom_messages_group":[],"rop_publish_now":"initial","rop_publish_now_accounts":{"facebook_10104259587489742_110062855004561":""},"rop_publish_now_history":[],"rop_publish_now_status":"pending","_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,48,53],"tags":[4629,5,6,4436,4628,16],"coauthors":[5391],"class_list":{"0":"post-3539","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-jewelry-education","8":"category-how-to-propose","9":"category-love-relationships","10":"tag-advice","11":"tag-education","12":"tag-engagement-rings","13":"tag-love-and-relationships","14":"tag-ready-to-get-engaged","15":"tag-relationships"},"yoast_head":"\nHow Do You Know When You're Ready to Get Engaged?<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"July 19, 2019 - How do you know you're ready to get engaged? 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These seven reasons are great indicators that it's time to invest in that engagement ring.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.shaneco.com\/theloupe\/jewelry-education\/how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Shane Co. | THE LOUPE\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/shanecompany\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-07-19T20:48:39+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2019-11-13T22:25:24+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.shaneco.com\/theloupe\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/jamie_and_elias_header-1.png\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"2400\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"960\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Anna Gionet\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@https:\/\/twitter.com\/shanecompany\/\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@ShaneCompany\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Anna Gionet\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"6 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/jewelry-education\\\/how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/jewelry-education\\\/how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Anna Gionet\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/0a8292188ad9e888fd76997aa5d3bad7\"},\"headline\":\"How Do You Know When You’re Ready to Get Engaged?\",\"datePublished\":\"2019-07-19T20:48:39+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2019-11-13T22:25:24+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/jewelry-education\\\/how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":1286,\"commentCount\":2,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/jewelry-education\\\/how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2019\\\/07\\\/jamie_and_elias_header-1.png\",\"keywords\":[\"Advice\",\"Education\",\"Engagement Rings\",\"Love and Relationships\",\"Ready to Get Engaged\",\"Relationships\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Education\",\"How to Propose\",\"Love & Relationships\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/jewelry-education\\\/how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/jewelry-education\\\/how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/jewelry-education\\\/how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged\\\/\",\"name\":\"How Do You Know When You're Ready to Get Engaged?\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/jewelry-education\\\/how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/jewelry-education\\\/how-do-you-know-when-youre-ready-to-get-engaged\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.shaneco.com\\\/theloupe\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2019\\\/07\\\/jamie_and_elias_header-1.png\",\"datePublished\":\"2019-07-19T20:48:39+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2019-11-13T22:25:24+00:00\",\"description\":\"July 19, 2019 - How do you know you're ready to get engaged? 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